I've been quiet lately. Recently it feels like writing is more of a hobby rather than a necessity. I'm not totally sure why, but when I reflect on how I've felt the past few months, I can't recall having those episodes of acute dispair and anger that used to be so common. These days, it's almost as if the injustices of the world roll off my back. It's not even anger fatigue -- it's a true lightheartedness.
In some ways, it's a bit of a relief. Life feels easier and is less of a burden. I'm happier. I'm probably also more pleasant to be around. (Just the other night I had a dream where all my classmates rated each other from most to least liked. I was somewhere in the bottom ten percent.)
There are reasons in my life to be happy. I've completed my third year of medical school and fourth year has been much less intense; I took a vacation and traveled all over Taiwan; I've been playing more ultimate and I even flew to Seattle to play on my college reunion team and with my sister; I've been cooking more. I've been having so much fun that my usual porcelin complexion has been replaced with one that can actually be accurately described as "of color." In fact, the other day I experienced the distinct pleasure of some old white guy aggressively yelling at me from across the street, "MABUHAY!"
And while I'm sure that there are folks in my life that probably think this is a change for the better, I'm not sure. Without much motivating emotion, I've been less active.
In some ways, it's a bit of a relief. Life feels easier and is less of a burden. I'm happier. I'm probably also more pleasant to be around. (Just the other night I had a dream where all my classmates rated each other from most to least liked. I was somewhere in the bottom ten percent.)
There are reasons in my life to be happy. I've completed my third year of medical school and fourth year has been much less intense; I took a vacation and traveled all over Taiwan; I've been playing more ultimate and I even flew to Seattle to play on my college reunion team and with my sister; I've been cooking more. I've been having so much fun that my usual porcelin complexion has been replaced with one that can actually be accurately described as "of color." In fact, the other day I experienced the distinct pleasure of some old white guy aggressively yelling at me from across the street, "MABUHAY!"
And while I'm sure that there are folks in my life that probably think this is a change for the better, I'm not sure. Without much motivating emotion, I've been less active.
